Dual tragedies struck the city of Phoenix, AZ earlier today as total of 6 news choppers crashed in two separate fiery crashes. First, 2 news helicopters crashed while covering a high speed police chase near central Phoenix. Firefighters and ambulances rushed to the scene, but were unprepared for what happened next.
“I saw the first fireball and the helicopters go down,” said Juan Perez, who lives with 13 other families in a single bedroom apartment near Phoenix Central Park. “Then about four other news choppers started circling the wreckage. You could see they were jockeying for position.”
Observers say overeager pilots and cameramen inched dangerously close to each other for a better view of the crash when four additional helicopters simultaneously collided, raining flaming debris onto the already wreckage strewn park.
A local station manager was nearly speechless over the tragedy. “What words are there to express the pain and anguish when a senseless tragedy like this ruins a ratings bonanza like a high speed chase?” he said. “I only hope that we can find solace when the overnights come out.”
----------James Dobson, the founder of Focus on the Family, publicly questioned Fred Thompson’s Christianity, saying “Everyone knows he’s conservative and has come out strongly for the things that the pro-family movement stands for, [but] I don’t think he’s a Christian; at least that’s my impression.”
Mark Corallo, a spokesman for Thompson, called the charge ludicrous, and more importantly beside the point, as “the real question in this race is whether Jesus is a Fredist.”
He said that Thompson would be making a public statement to counter the charge later in the day, after he finished attending “Wednesday Services,” which the spokesman explained involved Thompson throttling a filthy war protester with his left hand while he panfried some porkchops for lunch with his right.
----------Venuezuelan President Hugo Chavez said Wednesday that his friend, ailing Cuban dictator Fidel Castro has been walking, “almost jogging”, in recent days.
Despite widely-reported rumors of failing health, the 80-year old strongman’s doctors have devised a regimen of vigorous physical therapy involving variously sloped terrain that Castro “can scale down incredibly quickly”, depending on the percentage grade.
“Fidel seems to really love the steep ones,” said one doctor. “We can’t keep up with him. Almost as soon as we let go, he’s bounding down energetically with his arms and leg flailing and tumbling. Eventually we catch up, finding him sprawled out, quietly meditating at the foot of the slope, his arms and legs twisted behind his back. He’s eternally youthful.”
----------The latest Quinnipiac poll of Connecticut residents finds spelling challenger Quinnapeeack two points ahead of Kwinnapeiak among voters, 48-46. Quinnipiac, the actual spelling of the poll, is preferred among just 6% of respondants.
It is believed the contentious spelling of Iraq is driving the surprising results, as bitter divisions as to whether to call the nascent democracy, which may or may not be in a state of civil war, Irak, Irack, or Eyerach have split the Connecticut electorate and created an unexpected three- way race.
The poll also asked opinions on the Lieberman- Lamont matchup, but those results were largely boring, it being like at least two months until the election, which means that the poll is virtually meaningless.
----------Hundreds of filthy Jews wandered around the streets of Kiryat Shemona on Thursday, after a Ketusha rocket fired by Hizb’Allah struck a laundry detergent factory, setting it ablaze.
A Hizb’Allah spokesman said the strike was “just vengeance” for the continued attacks by Israel which have “killed no one but innocent civilians excersizing their 2nd Amendment rights, destroyed baby formula and medicine factories that I’m afraid are too dangerous for you to enter and inspect, and damaged playgrounds where our children play in spider holes and underground bunkers.”
When asked if Hezb’Allah would be ridiculing their Israeli enemies as “filthy Jews” after striking their supply of laundry detergent, he responded: “I don’t get it. What is that?”
----------
Hello, I'm world famous physicist Stephen Hawking.
Although generally I don't like much that comes out of North Carolina, scientists at Duke University, recently successfully attached a working robotic arm to a monkey test subject. Using implants connected directly to its brain, the monkey was able to control the arm just-as-if it were its own.
This is […]
A “Sicilian Gesture” made by Justice Antonin Scalia has ignited a firestorm of debate in legal circles as to whether the gesture is obscene or not. Scalia maintains it is not, but there is by no means unanimity among other justices.
Hooray! The Carnival of Comedy is up at Dr. Phat Tony’s.
And since border enforcement is on everybody’s mind this week, who is the good Doctor to buck the trend?
Now go, and be amused. (Especially by that fetching post at the top of the pile.)
And make sure to visit the Carnival of Satire as well, […]
It was uber-blogger Jeff Herring that first noted that media reports were almost universal in parrotting Ms. Carroll’s description of her emancipation from captivity as her “release.”
Follow forty years in the amazing lives of seven Latinos as they live, and love, and protest, and grow, on the mean streets of LA in their fight to turn the America where they live, into the Mexico that they love.
LIVERPOOL - A local restaurant owner has created what he calls the “world’s most blasphemous meal” by combining the meat of a ‘miracle fish’ inscribed with the holy name of Allah, with a tortilla featuring the face of Jesus.
Sen. Harry Reid (D, NV) blasted the White House decision to accept the resignation of Chief of Staff Andrew Card on Tuesday as “dangerously incompetent.”
In an interview, Reid said that the move “shows the dangerous incompentence of a dangerously incompetent Administration set on policies of dangerousness– and incompetence.”
Scientists Fear Arctic Cold Fronts Could Become Frighteningly Comfortable Future generations may have to adapt to a grim nightmare of flip-flops, trade winds, and topless sunbathing.
I’m sharpening up my club and Lars is loading the Imperial RV for Canada’s annual seal hunt.
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In the past 2 hours, we learned of allegations that Ben Domenech plagiarized material that appeared under his byline in various publications prior to pointfiveblog.com contracting with him to write a blog that launched earlier today.
An investigation into these allegations was ongoing, and in the interim, Domenech has resigned, effective immediately.
Mixology: Dry (And Sick)
Mixology: Mt. Muthaf*cka
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