Dual tragedies struck the city of Phoenix, AZ earlier today as total of 6 news choppers crashed in two separate fiery crashes. First, 2 news helicopters crashed while covering a high speed police chase near central Phoenix. Firefighters and ambulances rushed to the scene, but were unprepared for what happened next.
“I saw the first fireball and the helicopters go down,” said Juan Perez, who lives with 13 other families in a single bedroom apartment near Phoenix Central Park. “Then about four other news choppers started circling the wreckage. You could see they were jockeying for position.”
Observers say overeager pilots and cameramen inched dangerously close to each other for a better view of the crash when four additional helicopters simultaneously collided, raining flaming debris onto the already wreckage strewn park.
A local station manager was nearly speechless over the tragedy. “What words are there to express the pain and anguish when a senseless tragedy like this ruins a ratings bonanza like a high speed chase?” he said. “I only hope that we can find solace when the overnights come out.”
----------James Dobson, the founder of Focus on the Family, publicly questioned Fred Thompson’s Christianity, saying “Everyone knows he’s conservative and has come out strongly for the things that the pro-family movement stands for, [but] I don’t think he’s a Christian; at least that’s my impression.”
Mark Corallo, a spokesman for Thompson, called the charge ludicrous, and more importantly beside the point, as “the real question in this race is whether Jesus is a Fredist.”
He said that Thompson would be making a public statement to counter the charge later in the day, after he finished attending “Wednesday Services,” which the spokesman explained involved Thompson throttling a filthy war protester with his left hand while he panfried some porkchops for lunch with his right.
----------Venuezuelan President Hugo Chavez said Wednesday that his friend, ailing Cuban dictator Fidel Castro has been walking, “almost jogging”, in recent days.
Despite widely-reported rumors of failing health, the 80-year old strongman’s doctors have devised a regimen of vigorous physical therapy involving variously sloped terrain that Castro “can scale down incredibly quickly”, depending on the percentage grade.
“Fidel seems to really love the steep ones,” said one doctor. “We can’t keep up with him. Almost as soon as we let go, he’s bounding down energetically with his arms and leg flailing and tumbling. Eventually we catch up, finding him sprawled out, quietly meditating at the foot of the slope, his arms and legs twisted behind his back. He’s eternally youthful.”
----------The latest Quinnipiac poll of Connecticut residents finds spelling challenger Quinnapeeack two points ahead of Kwinnapeiak among voters, 48-46. Quinnipiac, the actual spelling of the poll, is preferred among just 6% of respondants.
It is believed the contentious spelling of Iraq is driving the surprising results, as bitter divisions as to whether to call the nascent democracy, which may or may not be in a state of civil war, Irak, Irack, or Eyerach have split the Connecticut electorate and created an unexpected three- way race.
The poll also asked opinions on the Lieberman- Lamont matchup, but those results were largely boring, it being like at least two months until the election, which means that the poll is virtually meaningless.
----------Hundreds of filthy Jews wandered around the streets of Kiryat Shemona on Thursday, after a Ketusha rocket fired by Hizb’Allah struck a laundry detergent factory, setting it ablaze.
A Hizb’Allah spokesman said the strike was “just vengeance” for the continued attacks by Israel which have “killed no one but innocent civilians excersizing their 2nd Amendment rights, destroyed baby formula and medicine factories that I’m afraid are too dangerous for you to enter and inspect, and damaged playgrounds where our children play in spider holes and underground bunkers.”
When asked if Hezb’Allah would be ridiculing their Israeli enemies as “filthy Jews” after striking their supply of laundry detergent, he responded: “I don’t get it. What is that?”
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In news that tops coverage around the media today, it is being reported that W. Mark Felt, former number two at the FBI, has identified himself as the “Deep Throat” source of Woodward & Bernstein. MSNBC.com reports:
“I’m the guy they used to call Deep Throat,” he told John D. O’Connor, the author of Vanity Fair’s […]
Christian Slater hopes the Hollywood star power of Jack Nicholson will free him of charges
Actor Christian Slater was arrested in Manhattan for allegedly fondling a woman on a city street. The Washington Post reports:
Slater, 35, was accused of touching the woman’s buttocks near 93rd Street and Third Avenue on the Upper East Side around 1:50 […]
With the removal of Eason Jordan, the discrediting of Newsweek, and John Kerry signing his SF180, the conservative blogosphere finds itself adrift without a current outrage. Recent outrages have been noticeably weaker than Dan Rather’s classic “attempting to throw a presidential election with phony documents”: witness the Pepsico “America is the middle finger” outrage, or […]
Point Five has always liked the smart girls. They make us all tingly inside, and we get all twisted up and confused.
Many of our favorites are on the list. We’re looking forward to reading the others.
You should, too.
A research team from the West Middlesex University Hospital called for a ban on long, pointed knives, citing a rise in knife violence. A spokesman for the group stated, “Most kitchen knives are sharp, some are even pointy. We as a people are not safe until all sharp, pointy knives are removed from society.”
The […]
BEVERLY HILLS, California Director Oliver Stone has been arrested and charged with drug possession and driving while intoxicated. The absence of a charge for ‘Alexander’ goes to show that our nation’s laws remain far too lenient.
FORT WORTH, Texas The Department of Homeland Security is preparing to test a missile defense system designed for commercial airlines. The $10 […]
AP - Saudi King Fahd, whose oil-rich kingdom became a close U.S. ally during his 23-year rule, was reported in stable condition and improving Saturday, a day after he was hospitalized for unspecified medical tests
An official at the King Faisal Specialist Hospital in Riyadh said Fahd’s health was “improving, albeit slowly.” This after serious decline that […]
Point Five has discovered the secret fragrance — can you guess what it is?
To celebrate the new Paris Hilton commercial for Carl’s Jr., its time for a new Point Five contest.
Answer the burning question:
What does Paris Hilton most smell like?
Gym socks. The wraps you wear underneath boxing gloves Summer’s Eve Wet dog A finger after its been wrapped […]
The Green Acres Cast, clockwise from left, Alvy Moore, Tom Lester, Pat Buttram, Eleanor Audley, Eddie Albert, Arianna Huffington
Millions of Americans are mourning the passing of beloved actor Eddie Albert, who died May 27th in his Pacific Palisades home, surrounded by loved ones. He was 99.
The news comes as a special loss to new […]
It’s Friday and time for catblogging! I think I’ve got it figured out this time.
You’re such a good little CAT.
Look at you waiting so patiently.
Somebody’s going to earn a snack!
Oh, isn’t that just too precious!
Who likes to look inside
peoples’ bodies?
Uh oh, that doesn’t look good.
RELATED: Friday Night Catblogging
Thanks Mudville and Outside the Beltway.
Mixology: Dry (And Sick)
Mixology: Mt. Muthaf*cka
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